Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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