Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
