Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
