If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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