I'm going to jail i love you
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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