take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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