Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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