I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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