I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
