Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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