So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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