and next time when you feel me up, do it right
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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