I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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