What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
