The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
