Nicole vs. Life
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
