why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize