Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
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