I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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