I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
