East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
My butt remains clenched, sir.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
