i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I think your dad took our porno
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
