I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
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