I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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