just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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