id be glad to
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
