i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize