dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
