Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize