It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
