How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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