Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
