HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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