plz talk dirty to me
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
