the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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