Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
