nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
