cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
