if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
