So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize