i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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