I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I want her autograph on my taint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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