I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize