I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize