she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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