and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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