Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
