Plan B is the new Plan A
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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