Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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