i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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