Just took my morning after pill in the library
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Who died my cat blue again?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
